RSS Email

3 Easy Date Ideas For New Parents

Having a newborn to take care of takes a lot of your time. If you are a working parent then it becomes more important to give your spouse some rest when you come back. The mom is going to be exhausted, especially in the beginning months, even when she is on maternity leave.

Usually, the pattern of giving all your free time to the baby continues way after it is needed. People get used to the routine. Yes, you love your baby and want to be there for them and take care of them. But, in wanting to do the best for your child, don’t forget your partner.

Family trip to africa

You guys have entered a new phase of life together. Your bond has changed as well. You have become parents, this means new responsibilities. But, you also need to keep your relationship afresh. Many people need to reconnect after their first child is born.

Take some time out of your busy schedule, and enjoy a quiet date at home when your baby is asleep. You don’t have to do anything fancy. A little effort goes a long way. When you are tired and all you have been doing is feeding and changing diapers, a quiet dinner with each other or a cuddled-up movie night can do wonders to lift your spirit. Here are three easy dates that you can have at home.

1. Fancy Dinner Night With TakeAway

Do you remember when you used to go out for fancy dinners for a date? It might seem like it was an eternity ago. Right now, you might not be able to afford to go to a romantic, fancy dinner, but you can always bring the feeling home.

You must be tired to cook food, and might be banking on getting some of your favorite takeaways. Turn your ordinary, sometimes sad looking, takeaway dinner into a fancy dinner night. Put a tablecloth on your coffee table, serve the takeaway food with fancy cutlery, light a few candles, put on some music – now, you have a perfectly intimate dinner setting without much effort.

2. Have a Laid-Back Evening – Ask Questions

When you are busy, trying to juggle housework and taking care of the baby, office work and taking care of the baby, or all three, meaningful conversation gets lost. Your interactions get limited to things regarding your baby. This isn’t healthy in the long run. You can start feeling disconnected in the long run.

Put on some light music in the background, or just sit in your balcony or backyard. Lookout at the sky, watch the sunset together and just talk. Talk till you see the stars twinkling and it is time for bed. Ask each other questions. 

Talk about your feelings, your work, your doubts and fears about parenthood. Remind each other how much you love each other and appreciate the help. You can have snacks or wine with you, and just enjoy each other’s company.

3. Have a Picnic

You must have noticed that most of the ideas are surrounding eating and spending time together because those are two things that you don’t get to do peacefully.

Lay a blanket out in your backyard when the weather is nice. Do it when the stars are out so that you get a romantic ambiance and your baby is asleep. Prepare a picnic basket with either snacks or a proper dinner, and enjoy your evening together.

Final Thoughts

Even when you are by yourselves, chances are you will be worried about your baby. So, to enjoy your time together in peace, you can keep your baby monitor with you, so that you can check up on your baby as soon as they wake up. While taking care of your baby is important, so is strengthening your bond. Find time in everyday things and turn mundane chores into dates with some creativity.




Taking Care of Elderly Parents and Yourself

If I can, I’d like to get a little personal with this one. This subject matter is one that strikes at the very core of my heart. You may be asking yourselves, what does she mean by this? Before I begin, I think it’s important for everyone to understand that writing in the second or third person is just not suitable for this topic. What I’m referring to is caring for my elderly mom. 

Elderly Community

As I sit here and try to grasp the words to describe how I feel when I look at my 72-year-old mother, it makes me reminisce about the days when she and I were shopping together or having an argument over which color looks best for a particular dress that I’d chosen. It’s a rather difficult topic to write about because, after all, she is the strongest woman that I know. Now, instead of me going to her for support, she’s needing mine. There are moments when I take time to just weep because I remember those days, but then I stop to think that the example she’s given to me as a strong woman has resonated in my mind and spirit to be that strong woman for her.

Caring for an elderly parent can be quite stressful. The number of questions you have in your mind can be overwhelming. You want to know when will my mother get back to being that active and spunky person she once was? The more frightening question is will she ever get back to that point? As you come to grips with all of the possible answers, you realize the sobering reality can be a bit much to bear. Not only does it become mentally draining, but it can also be physically draining. While it is an overwhelming task to care for an aging parent, it is not impossible. You are able to manage your own life while taking care of an elderly parent.

Taking Time for Yourself

This seems like such a selfish task, but a task it is. The reason I refer to it as a task is because throughout the day, when you’re caring for your elderly parent, you can become inundated with the tasks that are required for their well-being. In order for you to maintain your own well-being, you have to put a few tasks on the to-do list for yourself. Things such as taking a walk, reading a book, or listening to a cheerful song can make all the difference in giving you the extra strength you need. 

I remember one time when my mother and I left the doctor’s office, I couldn’t get the thought out of my head of her being hooked up to ecg machines and the like. The doctors needed to run several tests to find out why my mother was having problems. The thought of my mother’s heart not working properly, and this image recurring in my mind, made me feel bogged down and depressed. After I got my mother home and got her settled, I politely asked her if she wouldn’t mind if I took a moment to step outside and walk around the neighborhood. That 15-minute walk did wonders for me. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you want.

Is Hemp an Answer?

Hopefully, this section will make you laugh. I remember having a conversation with my mother and her telling me she was having problems sleeping. I bluntly asked her, while I was laughing, have you considered smoking hemp? She laughed so hard I thought she was going to hurt herself, but she admitted that the thought did cross her mind. She then went on to make it perfectly clear that if she was going to smoke the stuff she wanted the real stuff, you know, the marijuana. 

We continued laughing and began talking about how much fun we had on our most recent Christmas trip to Hilton Head, South Carolina. That was a fun night. If you or your parents are considering CBD or hemp products, it is important to do it under the care of a physician. Considering their fragile state, you don’t want to do anything that would exacerbate an existing problem.

Keep It in Perspective

As mentioned before, caring for an elderly parent can be quite overwhelming. It can consume your life in so many ways; there’s not enough time in the day to mention them all. Understanding your limits can keep you from becoming so overwhelmed. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. During this difficult time in my life, as I watch my mother become fragile and weak, it helps me when I’m able to reach out to my brother and ask him to step in and look over mom while I take a day for myself. This is not being selfish. This is you taking care of you. If you’re not able to take care of yourself, then you won’t be able to effectively take care of your aging parents. There may be some tasks that you feel no one else can do but you, but I have news for you, other people can do the things that you can do. If you ask them, you’ll find they will be glad to chip in whenever you need them.

I hope this information can provide you with some comfort as you continue your care for your most precious jewels—your parents. Make no mistake about it, you can do this. Your parents will appreciate your care and concern as you help them at this time in their lives.




How to Make the Most of Your Golden Years

After decades of working hard, raising children, and celebrating everything beautiful that makes your life feel full, crossing the threshold into your golden years will feel like the reward you deserve. And what better reward for your tireless years of making things happen than spending the rest of your lifetime enjoying endless relaxation.

Whether you have dreams of cozying up by the Florida coastline or want to see all that the big-wide-world has to offer, making the most of your golden years starts with figuring out what will make those days the most memorable.

Retirement is about indulging in all of the slow-paced life you deserve to life. Now the golden question is: where to begin? Using this guide, we’ll let you in on the best-kept secrets on how to make the most of your golden years.

Pick up a hobby

Hobbies are a great way to channel your passions into something that brings you joy. Whether it’s a group activity or a solo activity, picking up a hobby is an amazing way to spend your down time, open your social circle, and give your brain a break. 

Without a 9-5 job bogging you down or holding you back from scheduling daytime hobbies like surfing or gardening, you’ll have plenty of time to ruminate over how you’ll tackle your next project or skill.

Not sure about what hobbies or activities are most interesting to you? It never hurts to experiment with a few pastimes before settling on the single one that you could never get sick of. Try these retirement-friendly hobbies:

  • Woodworking
  • Sewing
  • Knitting
  • Writing
  • Jewelry-making
  • Dancing
  • Cross-country skiing

Save up

In order to make the most of your retirement, you’ll likely desire some peace of mind in terms of your financial situation. Fortunately, there are a number of ways you can stabilize your income and savings without any nagging fear of falling below the poverty line. Even in retirement, there are a number of ways to stabilize your income and savings—no work necessary. 

Consider these fruitful options:

Open up your social circle

social circle

If you’re like most retirees who find transitioning away from the work world to be rather lonesome, there are a number of ways you can keep your social circles intact without any of the desk jockeying. Opening your mind and heart to new people is a great way to keep a zest of something fresh in your life.

For some retirees, joining a lively retirement community is an easy way to surround yourself with people whereas others may choose to join a book club with like-minded retirees. What matters most is the effort you put toward establishing healthy relationships.

Work on finding your happiness

With so much time at your disposal, there’s no time like the present to figure out what makes you happy. Listening to your heart may have been a bit of a cliché when there was money to be made and children to be raised, but your golden years are about you. Focus on engaging your mind, body, and soul and immersing yourself into the thing that spark joy.

  • Learn something new
    • From studying Mandarin to learning how to bake, adding another skill to your already impressive collection of abilities will activate your mind and keep you young.
  • Exercise
    • Staying active is a crucial part of getting older as it helps you keep your mind and body in tip-top shape. Finding a form of exercise that is equal parts fun and challenging is sure to bring a smile to your face every time you do it.
  • Volunteer
    • Volunteering is a great way to utilize your free time as it gets you involved in your community and it leaves you feeling good, knowing you’ve contributed to making the world a better place.

Your golden years are meant to be the happiest and most relaxed of your life. With these tips, you’ll have all of the insight you need to make your retirement years the best yet.




Birth Injury Guide – when to seek Legal Representation

The birth of a new baby should be a moment that is filled with joy, happiness and excitement for the future. But when the concerns of the mother aren’t listened to and negligence in the delivery room occurs, that’s when things can take a devastating turn. A birth injury, one either inflicted on the mother or the baby is devastating for everyone involved. It can have life changing consequences, and when this event was the fault of the medical team it’s even more distressing. Here we’ll look at some of the most common birth injuries and when to seek legal representation. 

injury

Brain injuries

There are a wide range of birth injuries. Ranging from varying types of cerebral palsy to oxygen deprivation and trauma. Here are some of the most common brain injuries in a birth injury case.

  • A brain injury caused by an undiagnosed infection that has spread to the brain. 
  • Asphyxia – brain damage caused by a lack of oxygen. Often caused by the umbilical cord becoming tangled around the baby’s neck. 
  • Bleeding on the brain
  • A brain injury caused by trauma – possibly caused by improper use of medical equipment such as forceps/ventouse. 

You baby could make a full recovery from an injury such as these or they could have a life long disability. This is determined by the severity of the injury and the area of the brain affected. 

Cerebral Palsy

Cerebral Palsy is an issue that effects the motor skills and muscle movement. And is usually happens before or during your baby’s birth. Your doctor has a duty of care towards you and your baby, which means keeping you both safe and delivering your baby safely is their number one priority. If your baby suffers one of the injuries below that results in cerebral palsy, then they could be negligent and legally accountable. 

  • A catastrophic bleed on the brain
  • Lack of oxygen
  • Fever and undiagnosed infection 
  • Negligence from the medical team
  • Heart attack/stroke

Erb’s Palsy

Sometimes a mother may need help to have her baby, especially if your baby’s shoulder becomes stuck behind your pubic bone – shoulder dystocia. This is when your medical team will intervene and help your baby to be born. Often this will go ahead without issue, however if your baby’s neck is stretched too far then damage can be caused to their nerves resulting in Erb’s Palsy. Erb’s Palsy is a condition where your child’s arm, hand or shoulder is paralysed. Often they will recover, however they will need subsequent medical treatment and even physiotherapy. The common causes of Erb’s Palsy are below:

  • Excessive pulling of the baby’s neck during delivery
  • Pulling on the baby’s feet (breech position)

When to seek legal representation

Considering a legal case is a big step, which is why if you and your baby have suffered due to a negligent medical team you should speak with a lawyer first. If your case is successful then you will be able to secure financial security for your child and their ongoing medical care. It will also highlight the negligence of the team involved and hopefully stop this from happening again. 




Teaching Your Kids Friendships and Romantic Relationships

A significant part of a person’s life is spent in maintaining friendships and romantic relationships. Despite this fact, little to none is contributed in this direction by the schooling system. This is another one of those really important aspects of life, which is expected to be taught and taken care of by elders and parents.

Although it is a parent’s job to teach their kids about friendships and relationships and how to handle them. A lot of these relationships are formed at schools. Kids meet people their own age, learn with them, play with them, and even fight with them.

How To Balance Work And Play When You Homeschool Your Kids

They spend a lot of time together with strangers their own age, which in turn turns that time spending into something more substantial, and they became friends from classmates. You can easily tell which kid has been taught to respect others and take other people’s feelings into consideration.

Teachers can easily see the pattern, and if a kid seems to lack social skills, we tend to isolate them. They are punished for being a nuisance, for troubling other kids, and for being difficult to be around in general. A lot of our teaching strategies revolve around punishing for the wrong but we tend to forget to correct the wrong.

The constant breaking of relationships nowadays is proof that people need to be taught how to respect others’ space, learn to trust, overcome bad times, share feelings, and communicate. With social media making connecting with people easier, it has made making real connections difficult.

Dating, romance, and sexual urges are frowned upon and ignored in certain countries, which ironically ends up worsening the situation as children grow up learning from wrong sources. Be open with your kids, be open to answering questions. Coming to you with anything shouldn’t be scary for your kids, even if it is a question in regards to sex.

It is high time this is acknowledged as a fact of life, and schools try to lay down a foundation from the beginning of a person’s life. Some schools have taken that up by introducing sex education into their curriculum. 

But, that being said, there is only so much the education system can do. They can tell them what to do, but with a population of kids with different learning abilities and different backgrounds, they can’t make sure that every kid understands.

As parents and elders, it then becomes our responsibility to be there for the kids while they explore things, while they learn the meaning of friendships, companionships, and relationships. 

In times, when it is so easy to connect but so difficult to understand the difference between what’s real and what’s not, there is more need than ever to be there to guide the kids.

Let them make their own mistakes, but be with them at every turn, teaching them and guiding them.




Simple Eco-Friendly Lifestyle Tips For Families

77% of Americans want to learn to live more sustainably, Forbes reports. Families are interested in becoming greener largely due to issues of climate change, biodiversity loss, and plastic pollution. However, some parents don’t know where to start or doubt they’d make much of a difference. The good news is making just a few, small changes to your family’s lifestyle is enough to lower your carbon footprint and help the environment.  

eco tips

Start recycling 

The current U.S. recycling rate is roughly 34%. Getting that number up to 75% will have the same effect as removing 50 million passenger cars from U.S. roads. Introducing recycling bins for plastic and paper into your home can get your family into the habit of recycling. You can then use your city’s curbside program or local recycling drop-off centre to empty the bins. Scrap metal like aluminium, copper, and steel is another important material to recycle. Recycling scrap metal conserves natural resources and reduces greenhouse gas emissions produced during manufacturing new metal, Gardner Metal explains. For example, recycling aluminium rather than making it from virgin ore results in energy savings of up to 92%.

Conserve energy

Conserving energy at home will lower your energy bills and help the planet. For example, encourage your children to turn off lights and electronics when they’re not using them. This is a simple way to teach them about the importance of energy conservation without nagging them about using their devices too much. Additionally, start using power strips. Your electronic devices actually continue to use power when they’re plugged in but turned off. So, plugging all your devices into one or two power strips makes it easy for you to unplug the whole thing in one go and save energy. 

Grow your own food 

Growing your own food helps you save money, reduces your environmental impact, and lets you enjoy fresher better-tasting food. It’s also a fun way to get your kids outdoors and teach them a valuable life skill. Cherry tomatoes, snap peas, and strawberries are easy to grow and fun for children to watch grow and pick and eat once they’re ready. You also don’t necessarily need a big space to start a garden. Vegetables can even be planted in pots or hanging baskets.  

Making a few small lifestyle changes can end up making a big impact on the environment. These green living tips can help your family become more eco-conscious. 




The Importance of Teaching Kids Basic Life Skills

We have all laughed at memes and experiences online on “If only I learned this in school…” We often say that our education system needs to change, we need to teach kids more real-life skills than algebra, and so on. What we don’t focus on is that, it isn’t the sole responsibility of the educational institute to teach things, parents have the same responsibility toward their kids.

Skills like cooking, repairing, and swimming, are all life skills that might not necessarily be vital in life, thanks to modern advancements, but they are some of the basic survival skills that make a person independent and confident to live alone. 

kids active

Children learn by watching us. Involving them in various healthy activities is a great way to cultivate good habits in them, and teach them things that will help them survive independently. Start doing chores with them so that the tasks become more of a bonding moment between you and your kids. When we do things together with them, instead of asking them to do stuff, they are more accepting of learning the skill that is required to do the task.

You have to learn to be persuasive and influential to push your kids in the right direction; it is more like nudging them in the right direction and then watching them grow. Let them make mistakes, just be there to help them learn. If we don’t teach them basic things, then life will, and life might not be that kind to them.

If you do not introduce your kids to cooking, then they are only going to learn it if it is necessary or they have an interest in it. Because of this, when people move out of their parent’s house, eating healthy and home-cooked meals becomes one of their major struggles.

Repair work and swimming might not seem as important as cooking because they are not basic survival skills that everyone requires, but nevertheless, they are handy skills to have, in case something goes wrong. 

No matter how much we love our children, no matter how much we pamper them, they are going to move out as we did. Yes, we want to give them the best, we don’t want them to have to work for things, but they eventually will have to. Their situations CAN and WILL change, and we will be powerless to help it then. Change is an inevitable process, so you need to prepare them for the shift that is bound to happen in their lives.

To make the kids better equipped to deal with the reality of life when they grow up, we need to stop treating them like babies in their impressionable years and start treating them as transitioning adults.

Final Thoughts

Growing up is a combination of learning and getting a lot of things right, but seldom do we realize that what we teach our children is what is going to shape them into independent or dependent adults. Avoiding huge issues tomorrow is worth handling little tantrums today.




Does Everything Really Happen For a Reason?

Last time I was at a cafe, I came up with this blog about honesty and our relation with it. Months after, again a cafe trip has inspired another article. While sitting there, blowing my cappuccino so that I could drink it, I watched pigeons from the glass window.

A man who was feeding them stumbled and the coins from his pocket rolled out. He caught himself before he fell, dusted off his jacket, must be the shock of it, and then bent down to pick up his coins.

coffee

One of the coins rolled toward my window, while his shaky hands were trying to pick the coin up from the edge, the coin kept flipping, and then this thought struck me, about coins having two sides.

There are two very different sides to every coin. There are some who feel things don’t happen for a reason, and some say they do, that the universe is deterministic.

I watched a video once about how bangles are made and the condition of the workers. One of the ladies working in those glass bangle factories told the interviewer that people working in these industries were usually devoid of basic necessities and exploited both mentally and physically. 

She herself wanted to learn embroidery and get out of this ugly industry and life. But she had accepted her life as it was, saying, “God probably wanted it to be this way.” She then went on talking about why she believed that everything had a higher purpose to it that humans couldn’t understand.

There was another instance where one of her friends had a terrible breakup. She was heartbroken and kept crying for days. In these tough times, her guy best friend supported her. Eventually, she ended up falling in love with him. Things went so well with them that they even got married. 

After the wedding ceremony, her friend came to her and said, “I am so glad my ex went away from my life, I’m glad I found my best friend instead. Everything happens for a reason”

Things that happen have both causes and consequences. But people have always had a different meaning for the statement “everything happens or a reason.” They believe God predetermined everything according to a divine plan like the woman and her friend from the video.

Now let us suppose a situation. Consider a hard-working person, who has just got promoted to a senior position at his job. Later that evening, while driving back home, he accidentally gets hit by a truck, leaving him crippled for the rest of his life. 

Now the question is did the person deserve to get promoted? Of course, he did, he worked hard enough. But did he deserve to be hit by the truck? This is when people will be unable to give a clear answer.

There are reasons for things to happen. But sometimes they happen just randomly. ‘Everything happens for a reason’ is a good explanation for happy things. When bad things happen, this statement gives hope for a brighter future. As long as things are working out, what is wrong in believing in this?

Maybe not everything is according to the pattern. Maybe not everything in life is fair. Maybe

sometimes the universe decides to go random. Maybe not everything has a reason. Or maybe everything does happen for a reason. Change is the only constant that we can be certain of.

Either way, life is what you make of it. There are some situations where you have choices and some situations where you have none. Do what you can do the best, and the results will follow. Not always because of the grand scheme of things, but sometimes they just might because of it.




Healthy Activities to Do as a Family

Family time is something that helps us bond with each other and also helps us learn about each other. If we do not spend time together, then we are just strangers living in the same home, tied down by the titles of our relationships. Actually creating a bond is what makes a family.

With our work and other commitments, we often neglect our family and children. I agree that being responsible is hectic, but what is the point of earning things when the people you are doing it for will miss you the most.

Health is another one of the important aspects that are often neglected. Why not combine it both and do activities together that will help you bond with your family and also help you stay fit.

1. Turn Chores into Games

Teaching kids chores is our duty, it helps them transition into fully functional adults. Knowing how to do things around the house is important for surviving independently. Why not turn doing chores into a game that you can all do together.

Who can fold more clothes fast or who can put the CDs back in the covers fastest, etc. can be the little competitions you hold. Cooking food together is another of the activities that will let you bond and gives you enough workout if you are making something from scratch like making pasta.

2. Host a Dance Party

dance party

Dancing is something that the majority of people enjoy. What better way to have fun while also working out. Dancing is my favorite way to get in a workout. Host a family dance party, put on some music, introduce each other to your favorite tunes, teach each other your signature dance moves.

Dancing together will leave you laughing in stitches and will help you work up quite a bit of sweat. It is one of the best exercises that you can do together as a family.

3. Plan Scavenger Hunts

You can make a day your treasure hunting day. Hide things around your home, your background, or involve your friendly neighbors in it. Give a list of clues to your kids so that they can reach the final treasure of the treasure hunt or give them a list of items to find. Whoever finds the most item wins. 

The competitive nature of the game makes it fun and makes all the participants go scrambling to find things that will help them win. It gives a great workout because everyone is running around for hours on end, and the adrenaline has us pushing forward to win.

Final Thoughts

No matter what activities you choose, the goal should be having fun and spending time together as a family. If you can work in activities that teach the children new things, helps you learn about them, inculcates good habits in them, etc. then that should be a bonus. Spending time together is the key here because no bond was ever formed merely by being born in the same family.

 

Additional resources: 
 
 



Change is an Inevitable Process, Learn to Embrace It

Nothing on this planet stays the same throughout. Change occurs whether we are ready for it or not. The universe doesn’t wait for us to get comfortable. Darwin proposed that the life we see now too arose through a series of variations in the environment and hence fluctuations in the genes of the populations all starting from a common species of life about a million years ago. From single celled algae to a multi celled human being. When almost every day the nature is adjusting to a million little changes, why do we fuss about not being able to cope up with the constant changes in our lives? 

change

You change. I change. We change every day, every moment. To say a person is a happy or unhappy person is ridiculous. We are a thousand different variations of ourselves every hour. A year changes you a lot. You cannot even imagine how much things would change in a year. Have you wondered what you would be or who all would be around you next May? 

“It’s funny how day by day, nothing seems to have changed, but looking back, everything changed.”

While we are all cribbing about how fast everything is changing, how people change when they leave to settle in a new place, how your favorite TV show has just ended, how your school has ended, how things are simply ending, we are losing out on the new beginnings that come along with every ending. 

We have built a wall around ourselves, as a defense measure for our comfort zone. We are living in a place where we are content with our daily routine. We are scared or change and constantly try to recover from or get things back to normal (what we deem normal) as quickly as possible from even a little change dumped upon us. 

This is because we are not confident about our capability to deal with an unexpected change, so we put on a fake smile and wait for things to get normal. Even though the technologies have developed, man has mastered in almost all fields, our societal mindset still remains stagnant.

People have this perception that changes are bad. They feel that a man is supposed to stay the same throughout his life. If he is trying to adjust to a new personality or lifestyle, he isn’t supported by the majority for his new endeavor. This impulse to get back on track is responsible for our failure to sense and interpret the changes and develop healthy strategies to deal with it.

Instead of learning from our mistakes and taking note of the circumstances, we are busy trying to bury feelings and pretending to be just fine. For example, ageing is a natural phenomenon. But as soon as we notice some wrinkles or dark circle, we rush to get ourselves an anti-aging cream. We lose someone, we do every possible thing to keep our mind off them, and engage ourselves in some job or the other. 

Yes, changes are confusing. Confusion immediately thrusts us into a world which makes us feel hopeless about ourselves. But what we really need to remember is that “change is not a sign that we’ve failed. It’s a sign that we’re still alive.”