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Is Your Child Inexpressive or Just Unaware of Their Feelings?

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Want to know an alarming stat?

This study found that children’s mental health issues have increased as much as 50% in the past three years!

This crisis usually begins by the age of 6 and catapults over the years if left unchecked. One thing parents and caregivers need to realize is that a child feels emotions as intensely as adults. Sadly, not every child is aware of healthy ways to express themselves.

In fact, a significant number of young adults suffering from a mental health crisis are not even aware of their emotions! Is your child too quiet and generally inexpressive? Do they have sudden emotional outbursts to ordinary disappointments? What they need is emotional awareness, not another week of being grounded. Let’s discuss this in detail.

Signs of a Child Struggling Who is Emotionally Struggling

A child has complex emotional needs. When those needs are not adequately met, different children use different ways to cope. These coping mechanisms may manifest through the following behaviors –

1. Extreme Fear of Rejection

Everybody faces the fear of isolation and rejection from time to time. But children who are struggling emotionally feel these negative emotions with greater intensity. This naturally impacts their general outlook on life. They may be hesitant to take advantage of opportunities at school. In some cases, the child may experience bouts of hysteria at the thought of going to school.

2. Inability to Empathize

A lack of emotional expression may also manifest as a lack of empathy for others. Emotionally healthy children are able to show compassion to other people and animals. However, those who are struggling may completely shut off their emotions. This causes them to stay unmoved by others’ pain and suffering.

3. Dissociation From Love

Emotionally unaware children often find love and affection to be daunting. This could be because these emotions are foreign to them.

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They might cower or feel disgusted when showered with praise. This is again a sign of a child who needs help. Besides these, an emotionally struggling child’s plea could take the forms of low self-esteem, lack of identity, difficulty trusting people, and outbursts of frustration.

Common Reasons For an Emotionally Inexpressive Child

In most cases, a child’s wanting emotional vocabulary finds its roots in their formative years. Reasons such as –

  • A lack of attachment parenting, which prevents a child from safely expressing their core feelings
  • Authoritarian parents who are not so approachable
  • Emotional neglect due to overworked or busy parents
  • No family conversations about core emotions

These could lead to emotional dissociation and non-expression.

Strategies to Encourage Your Child Towards Healthy Emotional Expression

If you observe any of the above-mentioned signs, your child is crying out for help in ways they know best. As a parent, the pressure to raise an expressive child is immense. Here are some strategies to help you –

1. Personal Understanding of The Role of Emotions

Parents and caregivers are often unaware of the crucial need for a child’s emotional development. Perhaps they also had to face emotional neglect as a child. First, it is important to ensure that you are aware of the role emotions play in a child’s overall development. This process will help the parent to heal too. You can skim through parenting literature or attend counseling sessions to understand your child better.

2. Never Try to Stuff Your Child’s Feelings

One important thing to practice is the attachment parenting style. Let your child see you as their safe place. This will give them the confidence to approach you and communicate their needs. Even then, children can become draining and exasperating. During such sensitive moments, do not dismiss or suppress your child’s emotions. Give them space and time to express themselves. Moreover, resist that urge to react and lash back!

3. Introduce Fun Activities Centered on Identifying Emotions

Children and adolescents respond better to games and colorful activities. This is why Friendzy came up with the interesting concept of an emotions or feelings chart. The charts are available for different age groups and consist of cartoon characters representing different emotions.

You can ask your child to circle or mark their current emotions on a daily basis. Be it negative or positive emotions, make that a topic for conversation. Let them know the associated emotions with happiness, sadness, or anger, and ask them thoughtful questions. For instance, you can ask what happiness feels like to them and how they generally express it.

4. Set a Positive Example

It is true that children may not listen to what you say, but they will always observe what you do. Remember that children (even as young as 11 years) can understand parental neglect and control.

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Since your children are always watching your next move, set a good example. In moments of anger, frustration, and grief, practice healthy emotional expression. This in itself will shape your child’s emotional awareness to a great extent.

Key Takeaways

Every parent must realize how vital a role they play in their child’s transition from toddlerhood to adolescence. Children who are able to identify and express their emotions in a healthy way grow up to be mentally healthy adults.

And if your child needs additional support, encourage them to communicate instead of acting out what they feel. Most important of all, know that little ones are doing their best to make sense of the reactions within their body. Stay gentle, compassionate, and patient!