For many parents, naming a child is an exercise in self-expression. Unfortunately, they don’t always consider how a birth name might impact the child’s future, personality, and self-perception.
If you have experienced discrimination or feelings of disassociation due to your name, you might consider changing it. Of course, you should only make this kind of decision after much thought and consideration, as name changes may impact a person positively or negatively.
For most people, their name is a core part of their identity. To change it is to alter their identity to some degree. Here are several ways in which a change might impact you.
Feeling Empowered
Birth names can be problematic for several reasons. If there has been abuse from a parent or relative who shares a first name or surname, the individual may feel helpless or trapped—unable to fully disassociate from the name that was given to them.
In the case of someone whose ancestors were immigrants, they may even be discriminated against because of their name. Even in the United States—a nation that has benefitted from the influx of immigrants from Mexico, Spain, and Italy—a common name like Maria Hernandez may lead to stereotypes, jesting, or hate speech.
In other cases, the name may simply be too common—making the individual feel as if they aren’t special, unique, or important. Changing a name can be empowering, giving you a newfound sense of freedom and greater control over your identity.
Resonating with Your Values
An element that is often overlooked is how a name change can cause you to forge a stronger connection with your roots—whether cultural, religious, or otherwise.
You might change your current name to a more common name from your country of origin or to a name that has a deeper spiritual meaning or greater significance to you. This might allow you to feel more aligned with your personal values.
Reinventing Yourself
Similarly, a name change can provide you with a clean slate. Whether caused by your own actions or the actions of a relative or ancestor, names can develop poor reputations over time.
As long as you aren’t changing your name to escape debt or criminal liability, you can sever your connection to one legacy and build a new one from the ground up.
For many, this idea of reinvention is invigorating. For others, however, it may feel like a setback—a sense of tearing down all of the progress they had made and starting over.
Being Accepted
Unfortunately, there are very few restrictions on what parents can name their children. An unconventional name can make a child feel as if they are abnormal, unwanted, or rejected by society.
By changing a name to something that is more common or widely accepted, the individual may find it easier to communicate, interact, “fit in,” and break into social circles.
Impacting Your Career
Despite the United States laws against discrimination in the workplace, a manager’s personal biases often play a role in their hiring decisions. Stereotypes can even thwart a career trajectory, holding a person back from achieving their professional goals.
With that said, a name change presents its own set of challenges in any work environment. Beyond explaining the change to colleagues, clients, vendors, suppliers, and others within your professional network, it may take a while for people to become fully acclimated to the change.
In the meantime, they may forget your new name, accidentally refer to you by your former name, or avoid interacting with you for fear of making an offensive mistake.
Dealing with Logistical Issues
Although the name change may be highly beneficial in the long run, you may face logistical problems in the interim.
Unless you are getting married or divorced, name changes aren’t particularly easy to make. Bruce Lansky, the author of several books on names, estimates that there are only about 50,000 name changes each year.
If you wish to change your name, you will need to meet several requirements. Of course, these requirements vary from state to state, so you will need to do the necessary research before beginning this process.
At a minimum, you will most likely need to fill out an application, pay a fee, provide a copy of your birth certificate, submit forms of identification, pass federal and state criminal background checks, prove your current address, and get sworn statements endorsing your character.
Jumping through each of these hoops can be stressful, if not agonizing—particularly if your name change request is ultimately denied.
Of course, there are also all types of follow-up requirements after your name change has been made official. It’s worth noting that neglecting to notify important federal and state agencies of your name change may also delay government benefits, tax refunds, and communication.
Feeling Lost or Forgotten
Particularly in the age of social media, a name change can cause those in your outer circle to lose track of you. They may struggle to find you in an online search or keep up with what you’re doing, and at times, this might make you feel as if you’ve been forgotten or abandoned.
Keep in mind, however, that this is typically not personal or intentional. With time, people will catch on to the change, and your online circle will regenerate.
Facing Judgment or Ridicule
Naturally, there may be people who either don’t understand or don’t agree with your name change. There may even be people who don’t accept the legitimacy of your name change, continuing to refer to you by your former name instead.
Your new name may not be well-received by others either. Some may make fun of your name, create cruel nicknames, or harass you otherwise. As you might imagine, this can lead to feelings of isolation.
Community is the key to weathering this season. Surround yourself with close family, friends, counselors, and support groups.
Clear communication is also important. A name change can bring about confusion, so be open to explaining your decision to those who are genuinely curious or are struggling with the change.
