Children can be very demanding. When they want something, they expect to get it, and will not take no for an answer. There are so many kinds of parenting styles; some parents are strict and others are pretty liberal. It is extremely important for parents to find a middle ground; to know when and how to discipline their young ones. Every house must have one basic rule: “No means No”. However, it can be really difficult to be firm with kids when they are constantly throwing tantrums to get things their way. Throwing tantrums does not make them greedy children; they just don’t know how to control their desires. It is hard not to say no to those adorable puppy-dog faces that they make, but parents have to be firm and consistent with their decisions. I remember this one time when I noticed a colleague hesitantly giving her daughter candy before lunch. When I questioned her about it, she admitted that she does so only because she was sick and tired of listening to her daughter’s tantrums. When parents give in to their children’s demands, not only do the kids get what they want, but they also gain knowledge for future reference that their parents can be easily convinced. It can be difficult to handle such kids, but with a few tricks up your sleeves, you will be able to finally get your kids to stop begging. Given below are a bunch of situations starring Parent and Child, where Child begs for something, and how Parent deals with it. Good luck!
SCENE ONE: The Departmental Store
SITUATION: Parent and Child are out grocery shopping. Finally, they reach the much dreaded candy isle. The Parent tries to divert the attention of the child, but the child runs right over to the tall rows of candy. The excited Child asks the Parent to buy a candy. Like all good parents, the Parent says NO. The Child asks again and again, but when he realizes that the Parent is trying to be firm, he falls to the ground, in public, and starts bawling. Embarrassed, the Parent has to buy the candy to make the Child stop crying in public. Child gets what he wants.
REMEDY: Saying NO over and over again does not put an end to the conversation. Initially, when the Child asks for candy, the Parent can say no. When the Child tries to beg, the Parent can just simply say “Asked & Answered”. It lets the Child know that the conversation is over. If you are consistent with it, your child will eventually stop begging!
SCENE TWO: “Parent, there’s this party tonight…”
SITUATION: The Child nervously approaches her Parent. Gathering up enough courage, the Child asks the Parent if he can go for a party tonight. After asking for details, the Parent says no and justifies their decision. The Child asks again. The Parent says no. The Child begs, and tries to emotionally blackmail the Parent to let him go. Feeling bad, the Parent gives in, and allows the Child to go.
REMEDY: It is extremely likely that a child will try to emotionally blackmail a parent to get his/her way. The Parent must stay firm no matter what the Child may say. The Parent takes the decision knowing what is best for the Child. When the Child asks for the first time, the Parent can say no and justify their decision. When the Child asks again, the Parent should say,” We have already spoken about it. This conversation is over.” Saying this dialogue over and over again like a robot will teach the Child that the Parent’s decision is final, and there is no point begging.
SCENE THREE: Grounded
SITUATION: The Child begs the Parent for permission to watch the television while having dinner. The Parent refuses, and reminds the Child that it is against the rules of the house to watch the television while eating dinner. The Child starts throwing tantrums and refuses to eat the food. The helpless Parent is forced to let the Child watch television, so that the Child eats his dinner.
REMEDY: It is really important for parents to remain firm with their decisions, so that the child understands that the parent cannot be taken advantage of. In this case, Parent should have really stuck to her decision in not allowing Child to watch television and eat dinner at the same time. By allowing the Child to do so, the Parent is letting the Child know that the rules of the house can be easily bent according to the demands of the Child. The Child will feel that throwing tantrums is the easy way to get what he wants. Instead, the Parent must be consistent with her decision, and stay by it no matter what. When the Child asks initially, the Parent can refuse and remind the child that it is against the rules of the house. When the Child asks again, the Parent can say,” The decision has been made. If you ask again, there will be consequences.” If the Child dares to ask again, the consequence will be that he will be grounded for a week. The Child might initially throw a lot of tantrums, but he will soon realize that nothing can make the Parent change her mind. Eventually, all the begging will stop!
