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Dad Is Stressing Big Time Here!!!

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Sabreena just turned 15 which means next year she will take drivers ed in school (unless DE changes the law) and getting her drivers license and to be honest I am stressed big time.

Getting insurance, a car and just the fact that she is 16 and will be driving scares the crap out of me.  She is an extremely smart kid but that doesn’t comfort me when she is out on the road.  With friends in the car and text messaging young drivers have so many distractions on top of the fact that are just learning to drive makes me nervous to let Sabreena behind the wheel.

I think I was 17 maybe 18 before I got my driver’s license and to me that still seems young.  I know I am probably blowing this out of proportion but this is my baby girl we are talking about and letting her get behind the wheel of a motor vehicle alone with NO supervision worries me.  Maybe it is the father in me but who knows but I just want her to be safe and responsible when behind the wheel of a car.

No wonder I have so many grey hairs at the age of 36. LOL.

Do you have a child that is about to start driving in the next year or two? If so what are your feelings? Am I crazy to feel the way I am feeling?

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  1. I have one that started driving about three years ago.She’s 19 now. And, NO you are not crazy for the way you’re feeling. No matter how mature our kids may be, there are way too many distractions when they and others are driving. Things like cell phones are relatively new, but other distractions like tuning the radio, putting on makeup and even reading while driving, are not. However, as the parent, you can set down some rules, which many are backed up by law, such as absolutely no texting or talking while driving, and then come up with the appropriate punishment when the rules are broken. Stick by them!

    Then there is the additional funding needing for insurance, license plates, city stickers, and of course gas. Then comes normal maintenance. Many parents ask their children to contribute to costs so the children realize freedom and responsibility doesn’t come cheap. And it doesn’t!

    As a parent, I always want to protect my children. When they take that first major step to freedom, driving a car, you realize you can’t always protect them and it’s scary. Also it’s hard to see your “baby” getting into the car and driving away. You think to yourself, “Wait, didn’t I just put her in a car seat not so long ago?” It can bring a lump to your throat.

    Good luck to you and Sabreena.

    BTW, your stress and gray hair? Neither goes away, especially with teen drivers. Ummmm . . . sorry.

    • Your comment on my grey hairs wasn’t comforting. LOL. Hopefully my daughter will be a safe and responsible driver.

  2. To me it is always scary to hear how other countries, like the US, let teenagers at such a young age drive. In my country, Romania, it’s 18, for driving and drinking. Still, as you say, 18 is a very young age. I remember that I, at 16, I was very scared of cars and saw how much problems they can create. I am 23 now and don’t own a drivers licence as I am still too scared. To me, it doesn’t matter how responsible I am as long as there are others out there who are NOT. And THAT scares the crap out of me… Sure, it’s nice to be independent and all, but for me, the risk is too high. I congratulate you as a parent for being so careful and responsible and raising such a corageous daughter! May she never have problems with driving and as less gray hairs for you as possible! 🙂

  3. No drivers yet (kids are 3 and 7) but I already fear the day! I was 16 when I got my license and I had a bad car accident four months later. I did survive and I became a VERY good driver thereafter but I still worry.

    Good luck. I wish you strength — it’s tough to see our little ones grow and become independent of us with all the dangers that involves.

  4. Our oldest son is 17 and has been driving for 10 months or so. It totally freaked me out when he first started driving! I’m a control freak anyway, so the thought of my child being in a car that I’m not in control of…well, LOL, I was a mess. I still worry every time he leaves the house, but as time goes by, it gets a little easier to deal with. He actually had a fender-bender within his first few weeks of getting his license (backed into a cadillac) and our insurance sky-rocketed. I honestly couldn’t believe how much we had to pay once we added him to our policy. He has a part-time job and contributes toward his insurance which helps.

    Good luck to you and your daughter. One thing I learned from our son is that I think we waited to long to begin teaching him to drive. Our daughter is 14 and I plan on starting alot sooner with her.

  5. My son talked about getting his license for the year before he turned 16, but when the big day came…he stopped talking about it. When I brought it up, he changed the subject. It seemed it was a good idea until it was a reality, and then he was scared. He finally went for his G1 (like a beginner’s license) when he was 17 and we got ready to start teaching him to drive. I honestly thought I would enjoy teaching him to drive. In reality, it was the most terrifying thing I have ever done. I felt like I had no control over the situation and like I was putting his life in danger every time I let him get behind the wheel. He got his G2 (licensed, with restrictions) when he turned 18 and now drives all over the place, and I am less worried than I used to be. The good thing is, he can go get milk when we need it!

  6. My kids are 2 and 4 and were chatting about driving soon. That was enough to make me go crazy. So the real thing, I’m completely unprepared for.

  7. I was terrified too! They weren’t allowed to have passengers other than siblings for the first 3 months, and I was lucky because the school was 1/4 mile away so I didn’t have to worry for as long. It’ll be ok, Dad!

  8. karen M says

    Our big guy just got his license just before new years eve, I am confident with his driving skills, with his Aspergers he had to be the one to make the decision when he was ready. I had to explain that driving is a life skill that everyone should know whether they use it every day or not. He could have gotten it last summer, but was not confident yet, so we had to wait until he was ready. He just is not into hopping in a car and going anywhere on his own yet. He has a great group of friend he hangs with, he just made his Boy Scout Eagle Rank the same day he got his license,and a pretty responsible kid. I know I was really worried about him getting behind the wheel when he took his drivers ed class, I knew this was a skill that he had to learn, I will not be around forever to drive him to places he needs to go to. I need to call insurance this week, I am a little wigged on what it will cost, I heard that grades will make a difference on the price. Hang in there, it will get easier, once you see how well she will drive.

  9. Gosh no I’m not ready for those days. Gavyn is only 8 so we have a long way to go(although it will be here before I know it.) It scares me just thinking about it.

    • You are 100% correct. It will be here before you know it. I remember when Sabreena was 4 yrs old. Where did the last 11 years go?

  10. It’s always scary when it’s the first child. Oh, who am I kidding, it’s scary every time! My 11yo son will be my 3rd driver and I just can’t imagine it. He was just talking about getting his license tonight. Isn’t it crazy to think of her being that old? Sigh…I got nothing for you! Just lots of prayer!

  11. That is one thing I’m not looking forward to myself. Growing up, my friends were so reckless as drivers. I on the other hand am as cautious as it gets, even was as a teenager. I think I was more afraid of disappointing my parents than the threat of a car accident or speeding ticket.

    My only advice is teach her the best you know how, make sure she understand the rules (texting, phones, etc) and let your little bird get her wings. 🙂

  12. I think it should worry all parents, but I’m sure she will be ok. Insurance is lower for girls because they are less likely to say “hold my beer and watch this!” so at least you have that going for you. Braden is already a daredevil so I won’t be looking forward to that day.

    • You didn’t make me feel any better. No she will just say “hold the wheel so I can finish putting on my makeup” or “hold the wheel so I can finish this text” LOL.

  13. My daughter is only 9 but I dread her driving. At Legoland, she kept stepping on the brake and gas at the same time. Last month she went down a small incline in a friend’s soapbox go kart and crashed it, breaking the axle. The same time she rode in their motorized go kart and almost crashed into a basketball pole while going top speed. I have already vowed to NOT be the one to teach her as she has no fear and no control…

    • WOW. YOur daughter sounds like a daredevil already. You are going to need to watch that one. LOL. I feel bad for you now.

  14. Debbie Stanton says

    i have a 16 and 19-year old daughter… both got licenses at 16. I aint gonna lie to you – it is scary and heart-wrenching at first, but it gets easier. They are both safe and resonsible drivers. It’s a part of life and I wanted that same privilege and freedom when I was their age. Do you want to know what freaked me out more than them driving? It was when they took themselves to the orthodontist or dentist the first time… it was like, “hey, I have to be there.. I’ve been to every appointment since they were born!!” It was a big change, but for the better because really, I didn’t need to sit out in the waiting room for 40+ minutes every month while they disappeard behind the door and got their braces tightened.

    • I am sure she will be a good driver it just freaks me out. I guess over time I will be less freaked. I hope. LOL.

  15. Catherine says

    My son is learning to drive right now and last night was parent’s night for his driver’s ed class – nothing I heard put my mind at ease at all. I am right there with you Rob! I am so freaked out that I think I may need medication. And I have two more kids who will be driving in 3 and 4 years as well – I can’t get my head around it. There is nothing that will ease my mind because I know all the scenarios. It’s the other drivers on the road that scare me, then combine that with the inexperience of a teen driver and my thoughts run wild. I know I am not making you feel better! I am glad to know I am not the only one though, because the parents of his peers seem to be so much more casual about the whole thing that I feel like I am the oddball. Even my husband is rational about it and I am off the deep end over here. It doesn’t help that I was involved in two accidents where I was hit by a clueless teen. One who rear ended me and when he got out of his car said “oh wow, I was eating french fries and didn’t see you braking” and another who decided that since she couldn’t see past a parked UPS truck the best thing was to zoom into the road on a wing and a prayer and sent me across three lanes of traffic and into a light pole, totalling my car and almost killing me and all 3 of my children (one who was about to be born and decided to get the heck out a week later and 3 weeks too early). SO . . . feeling any better now?

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