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Is it Okay to Lie? How Honest Should We Be?

August 12, 2019 by

I was sitting at a cafe, sipping my latte, when I heard a kid ask his mom why was honesty the best policy – something about what his teacher said when it came to lying and being honest. Listening to their conversation got me thinking.

“Honesty is the best policy.” Is it always though? 

Is being completely honest and open with everyone always a good idea? Are we never supposed to lie to anyone, even if it is to make someone feel better? 

honesty

If a child comes up to you, asking if her drawings are pretty or not, would you mock the little girl because she couldn’t get the tree right? Or would you simply smile at her, and encourage her to draw more? I believe that it is ok to lie as long as the intention is good considering that the person cannot perceive the truth. It is acceptable to lie whenever that person doesn’t have the maturity to understand the truth.

‘The truth’ itself is an individual concept. There are a lot of differing opinions, different backgrounds, and different perceptions of the same fact. What may be true to you may not be the same for me. Everybody will appreciate your honest, straight-forward nature as long as you don’t give them one of your truth doses. 

Let’s take an example of the most common situation: ‘Do I look fat in this dress?’ Somewhere in the back of your head, you know that you are looking fat, but just when someone else points it out to you, you hate it. But if you like yourself in that dress, others’ opinions cannot bother you. Your perception is your reality. 

The amount of honesty depends upon our relationship intimacy levels. How close are we to the person? Because we are no one to trouble random people with our honest opinions and thoughts. Not everyone is going to acknowledge our radical honesty. If you are honest with everyone, people won’t trust you to keep their secrets.  

Ironically, this means they won’t be honest with you. The closer you are to the person, the more truth you must tell. But, the most intimate connection you have is with your own self. Never, ever lie to yourself. Tell yourself the whole truth, nothing but the truth. We all occasionally engage ourselves in the self-lie-denial. We are sometimes so afraid of the truth that we refuse to accept it; we chose not to recognize the reality, a defence mechanism we all use to erase uncomfortable memories and situations. Sometimes our heads need to admit what our hearts already know.

We can’t build relationships on the basis of a lie. But, white lies are harmless. Small untruths told to spare someone’s feelings or from politeness are just fine. Even if we are to tell someone some harsh truth, we should go about it calmly, making sure that we don’t upset the other person. 

So, is it okay to lie? Yes, ‘everybody lies and everybody dies.’ The truth is that not everything is black and white, grey is what we need to learn to embrace.




Mom Comedians Taking Over The Comedy Scene

August 8, 2019 by

Motherhood is beautiful, but there are a lot of daily struggles that come as a package deal with that beauty. Recently, a lot of moms have started sharing their motherhood struggles – from sleepless nights to the perks of having to deal with poopy diapers. This has brought on an influx of mom comedians, and trust me, even if you are not a mother, the way they talk anecdotes and laugh over the most ridiculous of things their babies do will have you laughing.

It is one of the most relatable forms of comedy to not only new moms but also others because we have all experienced those things at least through others. Honestly, it is better to laugh at the difficult journey while you complain, than complain and be sad about it, which is why many women are turning to shows that are focused around women and especially mothers. Things toddlers say – is one of the most hilarious parts of these shows that people in every age group enjoy. They are bizarre, stupid, smart, and adorable at the same time.

Mom comedians like Kristin Hensley and Jen Smedley, Ali Wong, Christina Pazsitzky, Natasha Leggero, to name a few – have taken over the comedy scene with their sometimes in-your-face and sometimes subtle humor. It works because it is good to see people, especially women, open up about their bodies, crack jokes to lighten the mood when nothing seems to be going right.

standup comedy

Motherhood comes with a lot of questions and worries – new mothers go through the constant struggle wanting to do the best and sometimes failing to do the best and beating themselves up for it. This helps them regroup themselves sometimes through dark humor and sometimes through absurdity.

With mom comedians becoming more mainstream, women are getting more comfortable in their own skin. Men have started realizing the positive effects it has on the women, and they have started being a part of the conversation as well. Through humor it is sort-of educational to men because it tells them more about what women go through with the pregnancy and early days of motherhood and then throughout. Ladies, on the other hand, find many humorous tales of womanhood, some light-hearted chatter, and learn to laugh at themselves and their mood swings that they were always taught were problematic.

buzzfeed

A BuzzFeed initiative has many women feeling good about themselves. This show revolves around Hannah Williams a.k.a. Wine Mom, who has two children and is on the quest of being the world’s okay mom. Honestly, the normalcy of the activities is like a reality check punch in a right way. It is relatable and funny. While it is not entirely comedy, it shows where comedy stems from for the mom comedians.

Us learning to laugh at our struggles makes it easier for people to understand it better. Mom comedians are not only taking on the comedy scene with their humor but are also helping open discussions that are considered taboo or uncomfortable like sex, periods, menopause, orgasms, breastfeeding, etc. It is “woke” humor, and I am all up for it!




Four Signs you are Dealing with a Troubled Teen

August 5, 2019 by

Teenage years are among the most difficult ones during our whole course of life. The relationship with parents typically worsens at this time as a teen feels like their parents cannot possible understand them. What is more, there are lots of problems at school, no to mention the fact that it is time to start thinking about an undergraduate degree at college or university. In case a child or his parents have chosen homeschooling instead of a traditional schooling program, the lack of socialization can have its negative impact on the way a teenager views themselves and makes friends. Here are the four most obvious signs you are dealing with a troubled teen. 

teen

The first sign to mention is the desire of a teenager to be the center of attention all the time. In order to achieve this goal, they typically do everything they can to remind everyone around them about their persona. In most cases, it results in doing something completely stupid. Even though it is hard hard for a teen to talk about their feelings, the actions speak louder than words. Thus, what they are trying to say is that they need to spend more quality time with their parents. In other words, they want their parents to pay more attention to their life. Having some pedagogy skills might help when dealing with a student teenager but a lot of knowledge on the subject in required in order to assure a teenager that you care and are ready to listen. A teacher who has got specific training in this field might be able to help. What a student might need in a difficult situation is somebody to talk you without any kind of judgment. They need to feel the support. Teaching others how to talk to troubled teens is of vital importance as well. 

The next sign to mention is the loss of self-esteem. As a result of that, it is very hard for a teenager to believe in their own success. So, some of them stop trying at all. In case one is constantly required to deal with a hectic curriculum while the learning process does not bring any fruitful results, it is not surprising one stops believing they will be able to achieve any goals in life. For example, one get the task of writing an architecture essay and cannot quite understand everything that is specified in the instructions provided by their teacher. Well, architecture paper writing has never been easy. In case you are that troubled teen who is currently trying to complete the academic writing task of writing an essay about architecture, keep in mind that the majority of students feels the same way. 

Studying at college leads to dealing with tons of problems. No matter whether a student has got a scholarship for learning personal finance or is paying tuition, being able to to do in the academia plays a vital role. Speaking about architecture paper writing, it has never been easy. In case you are that troubled teen who is currently trying to complete the academic writing task of writing an essay about architecture, keep in mind that the majority of students feels the same way. What you need to do in such situation is to go to your teacher and talk to them about all those aspects which are not clear in regards essay on architect. Surely, googling something like what is architecture essay writing help will be helpful as well. However, searching for write my architecture paper information will not help you in any way. Thus, simply ask your teacher or your classmates to help you figure out how to write an essay on architecture. This way, you will be able to submit a well-written paper with an impressive conclusion architecture essay part. 

A constant fight for self-affirmation is another sign a teen is experiencing some difficulties at the moment. Thus, doing various things to prove something to themselves or to the society is another way of making certain they are worth something. The only problem is that some teens unfortunately resort to abuse, bulling and violence to demonstrate their self-affirmation. Doing others physical or emotional harm, as well as the desire for revenge is another element of dealing with a troubled teen. Because of the fact that teenager is unable to process their emotions, they resort to such ways to express what they feel. The most useful thing to do is give a teen an opportunity to talk about it with a person they trust, as well as to demonstrate them how wrong it is to be violent and to wish for revenge. 




3 Benefits of Choosing Montessori Education For Your Kids

August 3, 2019 by

Every parent wants the best for their child. Giving them the best education is one of the major concerns that most people have. Many have started questioning our education system because it doesn’t seem to focus much on the overall growth of the children. People homeschool their children or look for different methods that they can incorporate in their children’s life along with traditional education.

Extra activities

Before I tell you the benefits of choosing Montessori education for your kids, let me tell you what it is all about. Montessori Method is a method of education that is based on the natural course of learning, such as self-directed activities, hands-on learning, and collaborative play. The classroom is designed to offer age-appropriate activities and children learn by making creative choices in their learning.

1. Children Become Capable

Allowing the children to make their own choices is the base of the classroom designs in the Montessori method. Children are free to choose which activity they want to work with based on their internal motivation without the adult giving them directions – this helps develop capability in children.

While some children choose to work with others, the younger ones often choose to partake in solo activities. But, that is of no worry because the course and curriculum intentionally provide small group instruction and collaborative activities. There is a combination of the independent, partner, small-group, and whole-class lessons and activities so that the children are capable in all sorts of interpersonal dynamics.

2. Children Become Accountable

Self-correction and self-assessment are an integral part of the Montessori method which helps children learn to look critically at their own work so that they can also learn to become adept at recognizing, correcting, and learning from their errors. Because they take charge of their own learning, they become accountable for their own knowledge.

The children are assessed daily by the teachers and the observations, and academic outcomes are used to prepare an environment that is simultaneously stimulating and accessible academically, physically, socially, and emotionally.

3. Children Become Knowledgeable

Order, coordination, concentration is nurtured in the Montessori method, which results in children developing the ability to educate themselves and to think about what they are learning. It also focuses on independence, which is basically the underlying foundation of the course.

The Montessori method ensures that the children are introduced to complex learning concepts via the means of hands-on experiences. Practical learning is the best way to get a deep understanding of any subject – this is why it is said that in many cases, Montessori learning exceeds state learning.

The curriculum is grouped in 3-year cycles rather than year by year like traditional learning. This is because the method respects the fact that children learn academic topics at different speeds. The teacher supports the learning of every area in spurts for the children to get an all-round academic knowledge.

Takeaway:

Montessori education is based on focusing on children’s growth where they turn out to be capable, accountable, and knowledgeable people, who also have a strong sense of self and are confident and comfortable in themselves and their abilities. 




How to Avoid New Baby Budgeting Blues

July 22, 2019 by

Having a baby might be a wonderful experience, but it’s difficult to ignore the expense that comes hand-in-hand with the pitter patter of tiny feet. Babies need a lot of things that you wouldn’t generally account for in your budget, like formula, new clothes, nursery furniture, and countless diapers. If you’re not careful, you could end up spending thousands of pounds before you’ve even hit your second trimester. 

budget

It’s easy to get overwhelmed when you’re preparing for the arrival of a new baby. However, the critical thing to remember is that just like any other financial goal, making sure that you’re ready for a baby just requires a little bit of planning and the right budget. 

Here’s what you need to know if you want to avoid excessive new baby debt.

1. Decide if You’re Going to Need a Loan

When most people think about taking out a loan, they consider borrowing money for things like a new car, or even a new house. However, there’s also a chance that you might need to turn towards loan products for help with your baby costs too. Don’t wait until the baby arrives to start considering your loan options. Start by figuring out how much you need to borrow to pay for things like prams and car seats now, and head online to compare your options.

Remember, even if you don’t have the best credit, you can still reduce the amount you need to spend on your loan by comparing providers such as HappyPenguin Loans and looking for the one that can give you the lowest interest rate and the least fees. 

2. Get Ready to Adjust your Lifestyle

There’s a good chance that you’re going to need to do some compromising to make sure that you can afford your new baby. After all, with new expenses to think about, something in your budget is going to need to take a hit, and you can’t afford to ignore things like your rent payments or your emergency savings. With that in mind, look for thing you can cut down on.

Maybe you can afford to spend less on entertainment each weekend – as you’re likely to spend more time at home with the baby anyway. Additionally, there’s a good chance you’re not going to be interested in going to the gym for a little while after your bundle of joy arrives so that you can cut costs there too. 

3. Find Out What Financial Help is Available

Even single parents aren’t alone when it comes to raising a baby. Maternity leave is available to mothers around the UK, although the amount you get from your employer can vary. It’s a good idea to get in touch with a boss and learn as much as you can about what you can expect to receive while you’re away from work. 

While you’re at it, think about creating an appointment at your local citizen’s advice bureau, where you can find out about any child tax credits or government schemes you can get involved with. You’d be surprised how much help is out there if you’re willing to search for it.

4. Remember Other Kinds of Assistance

When it comes to getting help with the baby budgeting blues, don’t forget that it’s not just financial assistance that you may need to think about. Asking around among your friends and family members to find out what kind of support you can get with things like babysitting and childcare will save you a fortune on paying for babysitters. 

Additionally, don’t be afraid to ask about hand-me-downs from other people in your circle that have recently had children too. Most people won’t mind letting you borrow some essentials, so you don’t have to splash out extra cash yourself. 

5. Practice a Frugal Lifestyle

Finally, as soon as you learn that you’re pregnant, start working on becoming more frugal with your money. That means continually looking for ways to cut the costs of everything that you buy – whether it’s food or baby supplies. Go online to check whether you can get lower prices from another supplier or find out whether it’s cheaper to buy certain items in bulk.

Some companies like Boots and Amazon even allow you to sign up for free parenting communities where you can get access to vouchers and special deals on the must-have items you need. The quicker you get into the routine of using these tools, the better off you’ll be when your baby arrives. 




7 Ideas For Mom’s “Me” Time

June 24, 2019 by

Being a mom is a full-time job and can get extremely tiring, especially if you are a new mom. You want to take a break but worry how on earth will your kids and your family function without you. It feels like you are the only thing stopping your house from collapsing. I feel you. I used to feel the same. I then realized how important it is to take a break.

Yoga poses

I talked about how important it is to take a break without your kids. While I focused on why childless trips are important for the couple, here I want to shed some light on the importance of spending time with yourself. Here are ten ideas to take some time out for yourself daily or once a week.

1. Solo lunch date

Take yourself out to lunch. You cook every day, and you make meals that everyone likes. What do you do for yourself? Most you would do is maybe hit the drive-thru or order some takeaway. But, you can do that anytime, and you don’t get some time just to relax. Take yourself out to a proper sit-down restaurant and enjoy your favorite meal in peace.

2. Catch up on your reading

With motherhood, a lot of hobbies take a back seat. Considering how time-consuming reading could be, nobody can blame you for not picking that book back up. Like lunch, you can instead head out to a coffee shop, get yourself a nice coffee and maybe some pastries, and read for a while.

3. Yoga workshop

You might not have time to join a yoga class, but a yoga workshop can be a great opportunity to learn some new things while also not having to commit for a longer period. There are usually workshops available that last only a few hours. It can be a great way to socialize and learn and let loose.

4. Get a massage

I know how much your body hurts from running after your kids all day and trying to do everything at once. You might not need to exercise considering the chores are an exercise in themselves, but you definitely need to relax. Book a nice full body massage session and relax while stress knots are all relieved.

5. Get a pedicure

My manicures don’t last so I have turned to getting pedicures more than manicures. Taking care of your feet is important, and your whole body will thank you. Throw in a foot massage with the pedicure.

6. Take a bubble bath

Create the whole home spa experience by lighting some candles and playing some soft music. Use bath salts or bath bombs if you like. Don’t forget a glass of ice-cold sparkling cider. Nothing speaks pampering like a nice long bath.

7. Go for a drive

Go for a drive by yourself. No yelling at your kids to put on seatbelts, to keep their hands, legs, and head inside the car, and no cribbing about long car rides. Play your favorite songs and sing along, put the windows down and let the wind blow through your hair, drive to someplace far away to do something from the options I have talked about or something completely different or drive with no destination in mind.




5 Parenting Tips That Actually Work Really Well

June 17, 2019 by

Parenting can sometimes be a task, let’s be hones, it is a task most of the times. There are wonderful moments sure, but there are so many painful and teary moments. Getting frustrated when children wouldn’t listen is really common. We always look for ways to make our children listen to us, do as we say. I am talking about tiny tots here, teenagers are a whole different topic.

Parenting

Teaching them things starts from a very early age. We have to talk to them, remembering that they do not have world experience, we have to tone everything down. Some people forget this when they punish their children or get pissed about something that the child did or something that they questioned.

It is their age to be curious and also to not understand the exact implications of their words and their actions. Teaching them how some things can be insensitive, can hurt others, or themselves is important. But, simply yelling at them helps no one. Here are some things to keep in mind.

1. Be kind in your firmness

Yes, there are times when being firm with your children is important and needed. But being firm doesn’t mean you have to be rude or mean to them or shout at them. Being firm doesn’t mean raising your voice. When you do that, you are not putting your point across. The point takes a back seat and the negative feeling rises. Being kind doesn’t mean you are a pushover, it just means that you show them respect. Make them feel their opinion matters while also putting your point across and letting them know that there wouldn’t be more arguing about something.

2. Teach them why they are wrong

Have you ever wanted to do something just because you were told not to. Children are curious, a lot more than we are. When you tell them not to do something just because you told them not not. The “why” will haunt them. It is important to explain to them why something is wrong and why they shouldn’t do it. When they have answers, they won’t go out looking for it.

3. Don’t be resentful

When children continuously do something we have told them not to, or disobey us time and time again. It is natural for us to develop resentment toward them. It can then skew our judgment and give rise to anger. This is how relationships go sour. You have to learn to identify bothersome behavior and nip it in the bud so that you don’t develop a feeling of resentment against your own child.

4. Be gentle with your teachings

It is easy to get frustrated teaching something again and again. Also, when you have to teach them why something is wrong after you have yelled at them for doing it, the anger can seep into your explanation and the child will focus on the anger rather than the lesson. When you child does something that you don’t want them to you have to gently explain it to them, which also entails the point about being kind.

5. Hold their hand while they learn about life

It is inevitable that your children will have to go through life, their own set of pain, tests, disappointments. As parents we want to protect them as much as we can, but we cannot. Every person needs to learn about life themselves. What you can do is, let them make their own mistakes and learn their own lessons. Let them know that they always have you in their corner, that you are always there.




Is Your Parent Ready for In-Home Care?

June 10, 2019 by

Taking care of aging parents can be difficult, especially if you aren’t sure what type of care or support they need. If they seem reasonably capable of taking care of themselves, but still struggle with some basic aspects of daily life, you may be too worried to leave them entirely on their own, but too confident in their independence to provide them with long-term care.

parents at home

One option in circumstances like this is in-home care, which can provide you with solutions for several problems inherent to seniors. You can also check us home care software, it is a revolutionary innovation that enables health care professionals to effectively manage patient care and provide a more comprehensive and holistic approach to patient care. This software is designed to streamline home care operations, allowing home health care professionals to integrate patient information, create comprehensive care plans, and manage tasks effectively across multiple locations.

The Basics of In-Home Care

Different organizations offer differing levels of in-home care, but most services are designed to provide a combination of medical attention, personal assistance, and companionship to seniors who are mostly independent, but may still require some assistance. The option is designed to be a more comfortable alternative to living in a senior care community or a more advanced healthcare institution.

Services described specifically as “home health care” include specifically licensed nursing care and medical attention, while services described as “in-home care” or “home care” typically refer to non-medical care, custodial care, or other forms of personal assistance. In-home care professionals may still be able to identify if and when a resident is in need of medical attention.

In-home care is available in a wide range of different options. You could hire an individual full-time, you could hire an independent contractor qualified to provide in-home care services, or you could speak with an agency.

The biggest advantage of in-home care is that it provides you with peace of mind. You won’t have to pay for intensive levels of healthcare or other services, and you won’t have to constantly check up on your parents. They get to continue living at home on their own, and you can rest assured that someone is helping them with the assistance they need.

Is Your Parent Ready for In-Home Care?

The big question is, how can you tell if your parent is in need of in-home care?

There’s no single factor that can clue you into this need, but if you notice some combination of the following, it may be time to consider hiring an in-home care specialist:

  • Difficulty with daily activities. A fully independent adult should be able to handle the basic activities of daily life, including getting out of bed, dressing, practicing basic hygiene, preparing meals, and performing certain chores around the house. If you notice your parent is struggling with some or all of these tasks, such as taking an inordinate amount of time to get dressed or being unable to handle the physical workload, it may be in your best interest to hire an in-home care specialist.
  • Periodic medical issues. When a parent has a specific medical issue, they need to get medical attention. The question is, are they capable of noticing and taking action on a medical issue independently? If not, they may end up suffering from an injury or ailment until someone comes in to check on them. In-home care provides a near-constant level of checking, so you can remain apprised of potential medical issues before they get any worse.
  • Mobility issues. You should also consider whether your parent is capable of transporting themselves, both around the house and out of the house to run errands. If they frequently have trouble getting up and down the stairs, or if they can’t easily leave the house to pick up something they need at the grocery store, in-home care may be a suitable option.
  • Cognitive difficulties. It’s common for aging parents to gradually lose their cognitive abilities, with or without the onset of dementia. They may have trouble remembering basic responsibilities, like taking a specific medication on a daily basis, or may have trouble solving problems they face in daily life. Having the support of an in-home care professional can mitigate the consequences from this.
  • Loneliness. If your parent is living by themselves, far away from you, or you can’t make time to see them regularly, in-home care can help them feel less lonely and get the support they need.

However, note that in-home care may not provide a sufficient level of care for someone who is suffering from a chronic health condition, a debilitating injury, or other health developments that require a medical professional. If you’re not sure what your parent needs, consider talking to a doctor or other medical professional about the best approach.

In-home care isn’t a perfect solution for every adult with an aging parent, but it does serve as an important middle ground between taking on all responsibility associated with caring for your parent and relying on a formal institution. Make an assessment on your parent’s cognitive, emotional, and physical state, and determine whether in-home care would be ideal for them.




What to Do and Not to Do When Negotiating Debt

June 6, 2019 by

Have an ugly stain in your financial past? Around 77 million people have credit reports that show a debt in collections. According to the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, the average balance is over $5,000.

debt

However, depending on the type of debt one carries, effective negotiating might be enough to help you climb out of the hole.

Here’s what you should and should not do when negotiating your debt.

Do: Understand the Difference Between Creditors and Collectors

A creditor is an entity that issued the loan. A debt collector is a third-party company hired by a creditor to recoup payment. In some cases, a debt collector may purchase debt and try to collect it on their own to earn as much of a profit as possible.

If you’re receiving phone calls about your debt, then it’s likely from a debt collector. The Fair Debt Collection Practices Act (FDCPA) protects debtors from harassing collectors. The FDCPA covers mortgage, credit, medical and other types of personal debt. If you’re receiving phone calls at odd hours of the day or feel harassed by a collector, you’re legally entitled to protection.

Even if a debt is legitimate, you can still write a letter to the debt collector to stop communications. Once a collector has received your letter, they can only contact you via mail and to announce that:

  • There will be no further contact.
  • They might take action in the future.
  • They are certainly going to take action.

Do: Know the Statute of Limitations on Your Debt

One of the beautiful aspects of America is the variance across regions, cultures, and people. When it comes to legalities though, we’re victims of luck. This is especially true with the statute of limitations on debt. If your account has been delinquent for more than a few years, you might not be legally obligated to pay it back.

It all depends on the state you live in and the type of agreement you have. Oral and written agreements, promissory notes, and open-ended accounts each have different statutes of limitations. For example, open-ended accounts, like credit cards, tend to have the shortest statute of limitations, with many states’ lasting just three years. Written agreements and promissory notes (e.g., a student loan) tend to have longer statutes, with over a half-dozen states having limitations as long as ten years.

Here’s a list of every state’s statute of limitations by agreement type.

Do: Document Every Discussion and Get Agreements in Writing

Whether you’re trying to survive a debt-collection experience unscathed or researching the possibility of having legally expired debt, your effectiveness at recordkeeping will determine your success.

The burden is on a debtor to prove they’re covered by a statute of limitations. If your debt is expired, you need to have the agreement that says when the debt originated. Don’t expect the creditor to help you out here.

It’s equally imperative to keep a log of discussions with creditors and collectors. Every interaction, whether in writing, email or over the phone, needs to be documented clearly. This will help you keep a timeline of events and refute any incorrect claims made by the opposition.

DO: Investigate refinancing or if you are a senior age 62 or older consider taking out a reverse mortgage loan to settle your debt with creditors at less interest. According to ReverseMortgageReviews.org, the current interest rate on a reverse mortgage is as low as 3.5%. This is far below the average non-secured debt loan which will save you A considerable amount of interest charges.

Don’t: Agree to Pay an Amount on the Spot

If you can help it, it’s wise to never talk to a collector over the phone. Of course, this isn’t always possible. They may use tactics to catch you on the phone unexpectedly. If this does happen, ask them for all pertinent information about your debt. Debt collectors must legally provide you with their name and company, how much you owe, the details about the original creditor, and information about how to dispute the debt.

If they are legitimate, request for communication via mail going forward or write them a letter to end contact. Whatever you do, never acknowledge that you owe a debt, and most definitely never agree to pay it. Both of these things could land you in a lawsuit you’ll lose.

Don’t: Yell!

Like any job, debt collectors come in many varieties. Some will be more pleasant to deal with than others. If you find yourself in a frustrating conversation, resist the urge to react negatively. Though co-founder of Freedom Debt Relief, Andrew Housser, recalls a story of a friend settling debt through these means, it’ll often result in more harm than good.

A rotten debt collector may be difficult to deal with no matter how you behave, but should things ever proceed to court, your track record of composure will reflect favorably upon you.

Don’t: Make Unrealistic Offers to Settle Debt

The only way to be successful in negotiating debt is to a) have an outstanding balance (the older, the better), and b) make a legitimate offer to resolve the debt. Creditors and/or debt collectors want their money at the end of the day. Taking you to court means time and money on their part too.

When deciding what to offer, first choose between a repayment plan and a lump-sum offer. Either strategy could get a creditor or collector off your back, but think carefully about your offer amount. Every debt and creditor/collection situation is different, but as a general rule of thumb, aim to offer around 30 percent of your original debt amount. You can help your cause by stating that you’ll send payment immediately as long as they sign off that the debt as settled.

Dealing with outstanding debt is one of the most stressful experiences we can go through in life. If this describes your situation right now, know that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Know your legal protections, communicate via mail, keep records of everything discussed, and when the time comes to try to settle, make the offer worth their while.




7 Ways Dads Can Help Moms with a Newborn

May 20, 2019 by
newborn babies

After she gives birth, the new mother needs help both physically and emotionally. The emotional side means giving her a mental break from the intensive care of the beautiful new baby. The physical side means giving her a break to do things for herself. You want to be the best Dad you can be the one. Here are some of the things to think about:

1. Exhaustion

If you are exhausted, remember mom is even more exhausted. Think about ways to help her and encourage her to get enough rest and feel loved. The stronger the mama, the better for the baby.

2. Peaceful environment

Set up an environment that is peaceful. This is a sweet, beautiful time with your family and it can also be very emotional. Keep the place neat and tidy. Fresh air, some light music, healthy food, candles at night, a kiss and a hug and a thank you to mom for making such a beautiful baby. The “little things” make a huge difference.

3. Be there for her

Anything and everything mom asks you to do, you have to do, or she would not be too happy? Take proper care regarding her diet. If possible take a vacation from work. If mom is sore, ask her if she wants a back rub or a massage. Sometimes, just by being there for her and offering to do what she needs is enough to show her that you care.

4. Learn to change diapers

Always make sure to check the diaper often and change it whenever needed. Go ahead and use as many wipes as you need. The goal is to keep your kid clean, so do what it takes to get it done. You should also take great care while bathing your baby.

5. Spend enough time with your baby

Bring the baby to mom, don’t let her get up. If bottle feeding, then feed the baby. Don’t assume all the feedings have to fall on mom, and she would love it if you would take on some of the feedings. This is especially true at night. It is a great idea to come up with a schedule that works for both mom and dad about who gets up with the baby and when. This means that both can get enough amount of sleep.

6. Help mom with laundry and shopping

It might feel quite overwhelming but remember how she manages all such things. Do the necessary shopping required for the mom and the baby. Also, cook her fresh and healthy meals. Make sure she is eating three wholesome meals a day that is full of proteins and nutrients, not much sugary and fatty foods. Give her green leafy vegetables, fruits and plenty of water.

7. Show appreciation

Let her know that she is doing an amazing job. Point out where you think she is doing great. Tell her that you are proud of her and how much you love her. Encourage her to go out of the house once in a while, and connect with other moms. Do ask her time tot time if she needs something. At such times, all of her attention is going to be on the baby, so someone needs to look after her needs.




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